Monday, April 12, 2010


Big-name celebrity sightings never really did anything for me. When I worked at the hotel, it wasn't possible for me to care less about diva actors who had their assistants order for them, or requested separate rooms to do their hair. (It's called a bathroom. And yes, there's actually one attached to the the room you're already in. Feel free to use it. Dummy.)

One of the only times I was genuinely thrilled to talk to someone famous was when I ran into Harold Ramis. I think Groundhog Day is one of the more perfect movies ever made, so I was basically tripping over myself to tell him so. 
I've also asked Kevin Bacon to call me Natasha, but that's another story, for another time.

Anyway, I was at work yesterday, helping some ladies grab some cupcakes at the counter and I noticed a familiar face behind them. Boxing up 10 assorted cupcakes gave me a minute to think about how I knew her.
Me: Another coconut? Absolutely. Who is that? And a chocolate vanilla? I know I know her. Oh, sorry, 2 chocolate vanillas? Her face looks so... holy shit, it's Blossom! 

For those of you who don't know, and apparently, that's a lot of you, Blossom was a popular television series in the early 90's.

As soon as I figured out who she was, it took all the strength I have not to shout, "Whoa!" Joey Lawrence-style. 

I immediately started smiling like an idiot because 
a) It was freaking Blossom!
b) Despite knowing I shouldn't, and really not wanting to, I knew I was going to call her Blossom. I think I saw somewhere that she's like a brain doctor now or something, so I'm sure she gets sick of the Blossom thing.

The ladies got their cupcakes, and up walked Blossom.
Me (smiling like a moron): Don't say Blossom. Don't say Blossom. Don't say Blossom. Hello.
Blossom: Hi. Do you know if any of these goodies are dairy-free?
Me: It's Blossssssom!!!! Does anyone else see that Blossom and I are chatting about desserts?!!
I'm afraid they're not. The Halvah bars might be.
Blossom: (sticks out her tongue like a little kid in disgust)
Me: (laughing) Oh, Blossom. You still got it. Hey, where's that funny hat?
Blossom: Also, do you know your potato pancakes?
Me: Do I?! Well that was stupid. Why'd you say it like that?  
Blossom: Do they have eggs in them?
Me: I believe so, but let me go double check. 

So I turned from the counter to make my way back to the kitchen, trying to get the attention of servers as I passed them to say, "Dude! Blossom is here! Blossom!" 
No one really cared. I TOTALLY 110% wish Tara was working that night! She would have understood!

When I made my way back to the counter from the kitchen, I delivered the egg news to Blossom and she thanked me. 
Me: Of course! Thank you, Bl--. Um, thanks. Have a nice night. 


Amalia said...

And then you hyperventilated for about 37 minutes, while replaying the event.

It was pretty special.

Jess said...

Um, I was not hyperventilating, I just thought it was really funny that Blossom was in the restaurant.

Clearly, you don't get it.

You know what else is pretty special? The vegetable you look like.

Amalia said...

Ooookay, Broccolini.


Macnabbs said...

Didn’t you have that moment though, when confronted with somebody that used to be famous but isn’t anymore, where you thought ‘hey, I hope they are doing okay?’ because even if they are living in a mansion with a swimming pool in the shape of their own face and have a gazillion bucks in the bank, you still worry about them in a former-celeb-on-the-rocks kind of way?

No? Just me then.

Although I fear looking up Debbie Gibson or Tiffany on Wikipedia because, in my head, they are living together in a 1990s time capsule (possibly a giant, secret shopping mall themed dome in the desert?) where they are still famous. Any alternative reality is not to be countenanced.

Holly said...

We were just talking about Punky Brewster the other day @ Zaftigs~was she Blossom's cousin? Who knew she was lactose intolerant?

What a thrill for you Jess!
Did Larry get to see her?

BTW, the cat with no pants...freaks me out!

Jess said...

Macnabbs-Whenever I try to respond to your comments I feel like a scrawny kid entering an arm-wrestling contest. Just as I'm about to begin, I reconsider, and feel it's best just to say, "You win."

Holly- Punky Brewster and Blossom were not cousins. Ha!! But that would have been an awesome show idea. You know someone in Hollywood, right? Pitch it!