Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Clearly, I've never done this before.

This is my bio for the agency website.  I didn't understand the assignment.

Jessica Martin grew up on her family’s farm in Brockport, New York.  She spent her formative years talking to herself in the mirror and memorizing lines from Full House episodes. She graduated from Syracuse University with a degree in Television, Radio and Film and that proved to be worthwhile in that she still enjoys all of those things.  After living in San Francisco, New York, and Boston, Jessica has learned the importance of light layers, irony, and remembering how people take their coffee.  

A fortune cookie once told her that she finds beauty in ordinary things, and she liked this.  But then another fortune cookie told her that she liked horse racing and gambling, but not to excess, so she’s not entirely sure what to believe.  She sort of thinks fortune cookies should stop pretending they know her so well. 

Open-Eyed Sneeze is her first book. 

9 comments:

Tania said...

OMG seriously YOU ARE HYSTERICAL!
"...that proved to be worthwhile in that she still enjoys all of those things." hahaha
I don't know much about literary criticism but I KNOW you are one of the best writers EVER!! It's like knowing when someone can't sing - you don't have to know how to sing to know someone else sucks at it! Hehe
I seriously think your writing and the sarcasm and the humor in it are just GENIUS.
Looking forward to reading your book - it's been a pleasure to know some of the characters in person!
CANNOT WAIT!

Ps. About fortune cookies - what is it with those lucky numbers? What do you do with those? Playing the lotto doesn't work I've tried!

Anonymous said...

I linked your blog on my facebook page - You're going to have MILLIONS added on your blog - FANS are fun! ;)

Jess said...

Whoa, Tania! So freaking nice! You totally just made my day! Thanks so much!

Note: I almost never end four consecutive sentences with exclamation points, so I really mean it.

Shirley Landis VanScoyk said...

You don't have to post this, but I think you are asking for honest feedback, so here it comes.

I think you are very funny, I like your authentic and original voice. You must be an unusual person, to see things as you do, and you link things together very cleverly.

All these things are true, and honest. In your bio, I would like to see your funny observations about yourself going somewhere, though. What about your upbringing made you? Shaped you into that sarcastic person (I personally love sarcasm, and often am) As it is, it sounds like you are using it to shield us from really knowing you. And if you play too hard to get, we will stop caring if we ever know you.

I have read a lot of your blog and I find it really really entertaining, but I think you have more depth. I think you are capable of great depth in your writing. Mirth without pathos is just silliness. Don't just be silly.

My humble opinion. I think you have great talent and promise. Don't just be the kid in the back of the class with the comment. Go deeper!

You are doing great!

Jess said...

"Mirth without pathos is just silliness" is a Meatwad quote, right?

Thanks very much for the thoughtful feedback, Shirley. And thanks for reading!

Sabrina said...

Why didn't you mention bumping your forehead into the mirror when you were looking at yourself/ducking back and forth one time? DETAILS, Jess!

Oh, and I'm ridiculously proud of you.

Anonymous said...

Jessica, for my critique:

I want to feel what you're feeling. I want to know what you're knowing. I want to be you,

so please... expand more. Then contract. Inhale your essence, and exhale it out on the paper for us. Drink in everything that makes you, you, and then let it all out in the bowl of literary dreams...

Oh yes, jess, do not be afraid of your voice, and we will not fear hearing it.

I agree with Anonymous that you're going to have "MILLIONS" following you because you are great. That is said in sincerity btw.

Jess said...

ok, weirdo.

ha.

MFB said...

FYI i will never stop caring if i know you :)

(even when i'm mean on the bus)