Tuesday, December 22, 2009

The 1950's Called.

They want their game show answers back.

This post could also be called, "These idiots will clap for anything."

The last time I watched The Family Feud was a few years ago and the survey question asked to 100 people was, "As good as?" 
When a member of one of the families answered, "Pie!" I told myself that I was no longer allowed to watch the show.

But when I had time to kill in front of the television yesterday, I thought I'd check in for 5-minutes to see if things have improved.

This is basically a transcript from the show because I ended up recording it and playing it back in complete disbelief.  

Host: We surveyed 100 married women and asked, when your husband is ignoring you, name something you can do that will certainly get his attention.
Dan: Not do his laundry!
Graceila: Wear something sexy!
Graceila: We're going to play!
Host: OK, according to 100 married women, when your husband is ignoring you, name something you can do to get his attention.
Graceila's daughter: Stop cooking dinner!
Family: Good answer! Good answer!
Graceila's other daughter: Start nagging!
Host: When in doubt, start nagging!
-Throw something at him!
Host: Show me, Cry!

So three x's, they switch to the other family.

Host: Dan, give me one good answer.  When your husband is ignoring you, name something you can do to get his attention.
Dan: Spend his money!
Family: Good answer!!!!

Host: Let's reveal the #1 answer. According to 100 married women, something you can do when your husband is ignoring you?

Note: This is where both families and the entire audience repeat whatever they see on the answer board in unison like it was the most obvious answer in the world. It's the collective Duh! moment. As good as pie? No, moron. As good as IT GETS. (in unison, followed by applause sign.)

Host: Survey says...
Entire audience: 'GET NAKED!' (palm to forehead. Of course! But what about when you're being ignored in public? Oh, no matter. Good answer!).
Host: And the other answer?
Entire Audience: FLIRT/GET IT ON! 
Obviously. Because nothing sets the mood quite like being ignored and throwing shit at people.


MFB said...

5:43 AM!? who ARE you?!

Anonymous said...

Not do his laundry? Not cook for him? - i have to admit, i liked the "throw something at him" answer.

#1 answer should read: "hun, I'm gay, don't take it personal"

That will get his attention.

The Urban Backpacker said...

Depends on what the wife looks like. Getting naked may in fact lead to even less attention.

My #1 Answer: See if Tiger Woods is busy. Oh!

Jess said...

Meredith- "My Girlfriend Sleeps Like Superman" is loosely based on my sleeping patterns.

Anonymous: funny. i've found that people will always look up if you ask, "Do you want this pizza?" Always. Try it.

TUB: Too soon.
jk. Cheers for the comment!

Tania said...

or - "You want this chicharron?" - haha ok ok the joke is old i know.
How's Boston smelling? :)