Tuesday, March 29, 2011

#This Doesn't @Make Any RT Sense

I hate Twitter.

Hate is a strong word, and millions of people can't be wrong so maybe it's me, but every time I sit down to tweet I get upset. We're talking temper tantrum upset. On Sunday morning Meredith asked me, "Are you going to do a morning tweet?" and I just about lost it.

Mer: It's one little sentence!
Me: It's STUPID!!!!!!
Mer: Just write one funny little hello.
Me: How about I write, "Hi, dummies. I hate twitter."
Mer: You're being ridiculous.

I'm just finding out about this deep-seated disdain. I started a twitter page a few days ago after having one of the most inspiring discussions of my life with the incredible Molly Galler. Molly is synergy personified. She talked about PR being a strategy game and discussed said strategies with an energy that was tangible. I was sold. The girl knows her stuff and can create more buzz than a can of four loko, so when she says, "Tweet!" you tweet.

However, three seconds into setting up my account, I realized I had no clue what was going on, I really struggled to say something witty with limited characters, and I didn't want to play anymore.

It immediately reminded me of my childhood swim lessons.

As a fat kid who hated to be told to jump into water, I loathed swimming lessons. Every week was a battle between me and my mom as I cried, begged, and screamed about not wanting to swim. The outbursts out of the pool were bad, too.

So I think part of the reason I got upset about twitter on Sunday was that while Meredith was making points that I didn't want to hear--It might be fun! You have to start somewhere!
Just once a day!--I felt like little kid me shivering in a bathing suit trying to clearly state why I didn't want to participate.

All I came up with was, "I don't want to!"

I'll have to sit down at some point and learn about it. #Blerg.#


Tamar said...

Okay, two things:

1) I, as well, find twitter to be one of the most pointless internet phenomenons of the last decade, and I refuse to take part. Leave AIM away messages in the past where they belong.

2) You were a fat kid? I think your doting audience is going to need some proof.


I have reached the peak of my career: I have been compared to Four Loko! I am happy to give a Twitter tutorial. Don't fret. I promise not to push you into the pool.