Monday, April 20, 2009

And More Etc.

While waiting for a concert to start the other night, Bri and I started listing stores with really open-ended names. I forget why we started doing this, but it was a pretty fun way to pass the time. I know I mentioned something about the most random store name I'd ever seen (Wicker -N-Things) and that probably got the list going, but I can't remember why I brought that up.

Obligatory 2-second rant about Wicker 'N' Things:
Why? Why name your store Wicker -N-Things? Would a person in the market for wicker products really be so intrigued by the "things" that they had no choice but to shop there? Perhaps. But a person not looking for wicker products would never browse around Wicker-N-Things just for the things. And "Things" is FAR too general to tag on to Wicker. Are these wicker related things or is it a store full of things with wicker in them? Or are the things literally just random things, like electronic toothbrushes and dolls? How is the store divided? One section for wicker, another section for things?
I saw this store like 5 years ago and it's still bothering me. I guess I should get over it.

But you know the stores I'm talking about. Bed Bath & Beyond, Mailboxes Etc., Linens N Things, all the "And More" and "More Than" stores. Futons And More, Beverages & More, More Than Carpet, More Than Bagels, More Than Shirts. These kind of establishments go with the More Than because it looks only slightly better than "Mostly Carpet" or "Mostly Shirts."

These are few new stores we came up with:
*Things and Other Things Etc. Unlimited Wholesale Discounters
*Edible and Inedible Stuff & More
*More & More Etc. Etc.
*Noun Etc.
*Etc., Etc., Etc., Etc., And More
*Copies & Photos & Socks and Nothing Else.
*More Than Things & Whatnot & More & Beyond & Beyond That & Then Beyond That Even More Etc, Etc, I Mean Seriously, It Just Keeps Going, Like When You're In A Dressing Room And Two Mirrors Are Facing Each Other And Your Reflection In Those Two Mirrors Just Goes On Forever And It Kind Of Trips You Out 'Cause You're Like, Whoa, There's Like A Million Of Me, Do You Know What I'm Talking About? Like Infinity Mirrors, You Know? Well That's What This Store Is Like, Only More.

5 comments:

Jessica said...

Reading that post was like watching a Seinfeld episode. Scary. But fun.

Jess said...

Too much? I sort of got that.

Maybe I'll start ending all my posts with, "You had to be there." That usually erases any confusion.
-Um, weirdo.
-You had to be there.
-Oh OK, makes total sense now.

Maybe I'll start using that after all my stories in general. Help soften the silence. Until, of course, this exchange takes place:
(Cricket Noise)
-Well, you had to be there.
-I was there.
(Cricket Noise)

In which case I suppose I'd just run away.

micah said...

omg you are hilarious!!! but its sooo true!

Jess said...

micah!

Tania said...

OMG, hysterical! I seriously laughed out loud --- and more! ;)