One of the funniest people I know described her day as such:
So far today i've had peppermint patties for two meals, set off the fire alarm by taking a shower, and cut myself on both the shampoo and a spoon. it takes real talent to live like this.
And later added:
aaaaand i got poison ivy. in the driveway. in february.
i quit this day.
There'll be days like this.
I once went into my kitchen and only found grapes, russian dressing, and waffle pretzels.
I made a salad out of it.
It struck me that this was no way to live.