Sunday, August 08, 2010

These Things Don't Happen To Normal People.

Motivating myself to wake up and hit the gym yesterday morning was surprisingly easy. I jumped up, got changed, packed my bag, threw on my sneakers and tied the laces tight enough so that there was no going back. If there is even a little wiggle room in my running shoes, it's far too easy for me to take them off, crash back into bed and tell myself, "Five more minutes."
Five more minutes is never five minutes.

Pulling my left laces nice and tight while scanning the room for other things I needed for the day, I looped the the bunny ears and spotted my cosmetic bag. Looking down to my foot, satisfied with the knot I had created, I lunged over to the dresser to grab my toiletries and promptly fell to the ground. In my haste, I had inadvertently tied my sneaker as tightly as I could to a strap of my book bag. Fully packed and heavy, it served as an anchor and literally pulled me to the floor.  Lying there like an idiot, I turned over and struggled to untie myself from my bag.

I eventually made it to the gym and things went well on that front. I showed up to work early because I wanted to enjoy the beautiful day and read for a bit in the little park by the restaurant. It's not even a park, really. It's a grassy area. Whatever, I could lay down and read, and it was nice. 

Twenty pages into my chill session, I started to get sleepy. I put my book on my belly and closed my eyes for a quick nap. I must have really been knocked out because when I woke up, a group of people and some sort of Park Ranger were standing above me. I remember flinching dramatically and immediately wondering, Um, what the hell is going on? as the woman dressed like a ranger kept talking about the Devotion House behind me. She was leading a tour, obviously, but why she chose to the lead the group of people to a spot directly above a napping stranger is beyond me. Lifting my sunglasses to rub my eyes, an old man in the tour group leaned down into my face and asked, "Is that a good book?!"

My life is a comedy.
I think.


MFB said...

ohhh it's a comedy. i've just ruled out half of Greek literature, seven fairy tales, ten Chinese fables, and determined conclusively that you are not King Hamlet, Scout Finch, Miss Marple, Frankenstein's Monster, or a golem. Aren't you relieved to know you're not a golem? :)

but seriously, babe, this is why you get those my-waitress-tripped-and-i-thought-of-you texts.

5 more minutes is never 5 more minutes!!!! thank goodness for that.


Jody said...

*Click* (that was me taking a mental wish I coulda been there picture to add to my stack of Jessica photos :) )