Thursday, October 31, 2013

Drop It Like It's Dots.

There are so many great songs about candy that explicitly tell you what to do and how to dance. As someone who looks for instruction on the dance floor, I appreciate the direction.

-I think he wants to see your Tootsie Roll.
-Shake that Laffy Taffy you brought.
-Well, get another one and count how many licks this time.

It's all very helpful but sort of imperative that you show up to the club with a lot of different snacks.

Pretty much any candy can sound like a hit song or a dance move. These are a few I'm waiting for:

Chocolate Bitcoin
Little Dots on Paper (I'm just eatin' paper)
Rolo, Yolo
Smarties, Nerds, and Dum Dums.
Drop 100 Grand
Raisin' Roofs and Raisinets
Twizzler as a Straw
Pez Dispenser
Can I Eat The Bottle? (Wax Bottle Face)
You Say Reese's Pieces, I Say Reese's Peese's
Peanut Butter Cup, Butterfinger, Butterface

Also, semi-related, do you think by this time next year Candy e-cigarettes will be a thing?

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